Potential Last Words: The First

"I forgot I was in here."

A student who has become synonymous with distraction and disruption was asked to leave class today. Throughout this year, he has belted out a laugh that makes shudders flee my spine only to be replaced by seismic convulsions that lurched my soul. He pulled this little trick again today, and I told him that I was tired of his distraction. He left with the saying, "I forgot I was in here." I picture some idiot sealing his fate by pulling the pin from a grenade with trapped in a bank vault, or a Darwin Award winner who tried to throw a stick of dynamite out a car window-but the window was still rolled up.

"I just forgot I was in here."

I can't say I've acted appropriately in every situation, but I think I have always been aware enough of my surroundings to know when not to do something. And even though this student only got sent to the office, I get visions from Burn After Reading in which characters find themselves stuck in places they never should have been or situations they didn't mean to end up in.

Verdict: these horrible last words would flag a person as clumsy in speech or action, leaving them remembered as a simpleton.